Chapters, My

8 10 2013

I’ve noticed in my nearly 30 years on this earth that our lives are made up of chapters, much like a book.

For most of us, it is outlined by major events in our lives.  For the military folk it is broken into their tours, as one tour ends, so begins a new phase in their lives.

I would say that I have had the usual ups and downs and life events in each chapter of my life.  High school and into the Navy was the first chapter, the longest, and maybe one of the most important.  It made me who I am today, and it is what shaped my values and codes.  However, the events since then have transformed me into so much more.

When I joined the Navy I was a completely different person.  I think I had always sought that structure in life, everything having a place and a recognized order.  This is what the Navy provided.  After boot camp, where I learned to just keep your mouth shut and follow directions…sometimes blindly, I went to school in Florida.  This is where I continued to learn how to not always speak my mind while I sometimes learned the hard way and rarely saw the “bigger picture” that everyone always talked about.  I just thought the military would be a four year job, and I could learn about myself, and start my college fund.  This is what I kept in mind for four years.  When I arrived in Hawaii to my first duty station, I was picked up for ceremonial guard where I performed in several burials and retirements.  This is where my sense of history and heritage began, meeting all kinds of people, all with individual stories and deep respect for what the Navy had provided them.  After a few months I headed up to my actual job.  It was not what I had hoped for, and did not prove to be as rewarding as I had hoped.  I was junior ranking, and I was so hungry for responsibility and the chance to lead people that I became discontented with my position and people telling me that some goals were just not possible.  I had some terrible leadership, and it is from them that I learned what not to do with my future Sailors.  I made a few long-lasting friends and got to explore Hawaii’s islands and also see Japan and the Philippines.

My second tour brought me to the middle east; the tiny island of Bahrain in the Arabian Gulf.  Yes, I actually had to google the place before agreeing to take on the orders.  Here I had an extremely rewarding tour and learned many leadership traits from several leaders who were in and out of the command, as it was a one year billet.  Although we worked our asses off and had many a 16-18 hour day, I wouldn’t go back and change a thing.  The work we put in was worth the dividends…but I did learn that when accepting high stress billets you need to be prepared.  I also learned how to live alone and depend on myself, so I came out much stronger on the other end.  I had time to start blogging and also get into fitness. For my next duty station, I knew it had to be a ship, in order to ensure my transition into the next higher paygrade, and also broaden my experience.

My most recent chapter brought me to the mighty sea….where Sailors belong, right?  My very first PCS tour afloat.  By far this has been the most rewarding tour yet.  I have learned so much from my chain of command as they have supported me in every move and decision I have made.  I have found my place in the Navy and they have empowered me to move forward with my career, which is what I will pass on to my Sailors.  The feeling I had when I was in Hawaii and I wanted so much to be the one making things happen and having those Sailors in my charge depending me was finally here.  It is unfortunate, but in the military you have to attain a certain rank to be put into positions of leadership.  Maybe I wasn’t ready in Hawaii, who knows, but I was  able to grow into the shoes that my previous mentors had left for me.

Through my travels in the Navy I have tried to date but never really made it work…some of the relationships bled over from one chapter to the next, but I could never force myself to choose my personal life over the military.  Which sounds pretty sad when saying it out loud.  Many a person has asked me what will be there for me after the Navy……the military or my family?  We all know the answer, however the military has yet to let me down as some of the men boys I have encountered….whether by simple incompatibly or pure self destruction.  Maybe the next chapter in my life will bring prince charming but for now I will stick with my Navy life and travels.  I am definitely open to any suitor that can handle this!





El Hombre

7 07 2013

I have been longing for a new hairstyle lately. I debated on shaving a part of my head…kind of like Ellie Goulding. Look that crap up, pretty badass. However, not so sure I could successfully pull it off and also not positive I would retain my enlistment in the Navy. SO, thus came the “the hombre.”

image-6 copyI got a Groupon a few months ago for a salon named Zina G in Hillcrest. It was $50 for highlights, haircut, and deep conditioning.  I showed up and the client before me ran about 20 minutes late, which was fine. I’m sure it happens a lot.  When I sat down, Zina herself was the stylist, and I explained to her I knew the Groupon was for highlights, and asked if I could just pay more and get an hombre (dye on top and blonde foils on bottom). She said she didn’t have time for that but would do what she could. Before the pic on the left up there I had blond hair, so what she ended up doing was dying the top 2/3 light brown…but what happened was the dye seeped down into the bulk of my hair and I ended up having just plain brown hair. Which, was not what I wanted. Also, she charged $20 for  “longer hair,” which she had disclosed when I called for the appointment. But If she only dyed the top 2/3 of my hair, what did the long hair factor really matter??

ANYWHO. Long story short (too late), it was misadvertised and don’t tell the client something you can’t follow through with. And if it doesn’t turn out like you said, you should offer a refund or re-do and probably not charge $70 for a simple color.

I was in desperate need for a SHAZAM! hairdo, so today I ended up going to Fantastic Sams in Santee.  This is a rarity, as I rely on Groupons or specialized boutiques for my hair. I am scared going to Great Clips or any walk-in hair salon because I feel like they are all brand new stylists that don’t have experience. However, I should probably just eat my words, because they did a perfect job! I went in and they were able to get me in after about 20 minutes. A girl named Shantel has done the hombre before, and took on the challenge. It took about an hour and a half and she was able to foil the ends and make them perfectly blond, with a nice blend, and also great conversation! I will most definitely go back to her and also suggest her to my friends.

1.  Moral of the story…don’t judge a salon by it’s cover.

2.  Hombre is the new blond!!

Love,

~Girl With a Curl~





Lane-isms

7 06 2012

So I’m sure at work you all have “that guy” who is completely awkward, kind of strange looking, and says shit that only creepy people think is normal.

We had one of those in Hawaii and these are a few of his “isms.” Found these while I was packing today.

1. Yea, the townspeople raised me. (Talking about how he was “raised in a cult”).

2. My glasses enunciate my forehead, they make it more pronounced.

3. Today is deader than my great great grandfather who died from kerosene poisoning.

4.  I’m perfectly content with talking with myself.

5. I was forced to eat one apple every five minutes for three hours. It was an order from the cult leader.

6. Why does no one talk about the fact Jesus had bastard children?

7. I wonder what it would be like if Inspector Gadget was a porn star.

8. My genius is actually true.

9. I’m not a good catcher, if you catch my drift.

10. (Someone asks) What color is this? (Lane responds) Shiny.

11. Sometimes I wish I was a bastard.

12. You just said my magic language.

13. My parents didn’t even know they were getting married until the middle of the meeting.

14. I don’t understand half of what I say or a millionth of what I think.

15. Someday I’m going to open Neverland Ranch 2.





December Tidings

6 12 2011

Well folks, it’s officially December. I can’t say this has been the most productive month so far…

I’ve been watching a lot of Teen Mom, Sister Wives, Real World, Gossip Girl, Desperate Housewives, and 19 Kids and Counting. Television kind of sucks your life away…I don’t know why I watch so much of it. Seriously on the weekend it’s like an all day thing and then all of a sudden it’s 8pm…where’d the day go? There’s this book called “The Black Rock”. I haven’t actually read it, but Sis Roch was telling me about it. It’s about this tribe back in the day who would waste away their lives staring at this black rock. They were so consumed by this rock that their lives flew by so fast and they accomplished nothing. Then all of a sudden they were old and crippled and they didn’t know where the time went. Kind of like a television box, no?

Speaking of black rocks, does anyone else think Kim K’s engagement/wedding ring was offensively large!? Like, 20 carats too large. Perhaps she will donate it to charity seeing as it didn’t really pan out..

Oh, and working. Which consists of going to classes for my upcoming duty on board a ship. Some diverse classes let me tell you.

We went down to Point Loma and Coronado Beach the other day and took some photos. It was a blast. If only I could do this for a living! But I don’t want my passion to become a job. So I’m happy doing it on my free time for now.

Me and the Missouri Man didn’t work out… Long story but I’m just not cut out for this long distance thing. I’ve known him since I was young, so we’re still going to be friends, but it sucks it didn’t work out. He can’t leave Missouri because of his job and I can’t leave CA because of my job. So that’s that. I think I’m giving up in the long-distance world of dating. It’s a hundred times harder than having a normal relationship. Every little problem is just magnified. I don’t know how people in the military get married or have kids. Well, the kids thing is easy. As for finding someone to spend your life with, you actually have to be in the same state at least to make things work. Considering I’ll be moving around for the next 13 years until retirement…that doesn’t make me very marketable.

Me and Sista Roch were discussing the other day how former bf’s just come out of the woodwork sometimes. That same day someone I knew in Bahrain emailed me out of the blue. He’d been on deployment for the last few months and just got back and wanted to see what I was up to. Why do guys randomly email/text/message you out of the blue? Well, my theory is that they’d like to keep you around in case they are in the same place as you and they want to hook up. That’s really the only reason I can see why they would want to string you along… And it’s never a, “Hey, how are you doing? How’s school? How’s work? Great, I’m doing well. Welp, have a good one!” No, it’s some crap about how they miss you and they wish they were where you were and so on. Well, I’m onto you boys in the woodwork. I’m not buyin it!

And, on top of that Mista B gets here in a week. We’re stationed on the same ship…I know what are the odds. So, mixed feelings about that. I haven’t seen him since April and I hope it’s not weird seeing him. I have been thinking about him. It’s not like you date someone and then break up and forget they existed and stop caring. So, it will be nice to catch up.

In that same department, an ex from Hawaii might be moving here for a job. He finds out in January. Weird. It seems like everyone and their mother are moving to California. Specifically San Diego. We don’t really talk much. We used to, but it’s gotten less and less over the years. I don’t really have any romantical feelings for him, but it would be nice to meet up and catch up on what he’s been doing.

AND, W is coming here in January for drill for a couple weeks. I haven’t seen him since summer of 2010 when we broke up for good. But we’ve been talking quite a bit. I still miss him and wonder what he’s doing all the time and wish that he would miss me. I’ve never really gotten a straight answer out of him about anything. I’m the wear-your-heart-on-your-sleeve type of person. And his is locked in a deep deep dark cave inside his chest. Maybe he doesn’t even know what he’s thinking or feeling. Guys are never good at that shit. But we basically have been talking for five years now. We dated for about a year when we were in Hawaii. Then we both got out of the military and it became a long-distance relationship. My favorite. Guess what, it didn’t work. I went to Bahrain and he went back to Hawaii and even though we kept talking the relationship thing didn’t pan out. But I’ve always wanted to be with him, regardless. It’s just tough because it’s up in the air where he’ll be for the next several years. I know I still have feelings for him, so maybe we’ll talk while he’s out here and hash some things out.

See what I mean, woodwork.





So, what do you do?

22 09 2011

I am one of those people who haven’t really decided what they want to do when they grow up.

I am nearly halfway done with my Navy career. Well, 7 years into it at least. Everyone says once you reach ten you might as well stay in another ten and retire. It’s the easy and safe thing to do, and normally the best choice. Career-wise anyway. But sometimes you just get tired of doing one thing for several years. Thankfully in the Navy there are several roads you can go down with my specific job, as well as moving every 2-4 years. Which is typically looked down on, but when you are single and wanting to travel and experience the world, it’s the best thing that can happen.

However, as I’m reaching the ripe old age of 27 next month, I’m reevaluating my life. Well, it’s not that serious but as my move to San Diego comes closer I’m excited for the new opportunities.

I’ve always wanted to go to Law School, and actually got out of the Navy in ’08 to pursue said school. I ended up growing tired of waiting for the next school year to roll around and decided to join back up…after an 8 month hiatus. I missed the structure, the camaraderie, and the free travel that the Navy offered. Luckily they wanted me back, and here I am.

Beauty School is another road I would like to go down. I am very interested in learning how to cut, color, style hair, do nails, massages, etc. I’ve always wanted to do it. Maybe they’ll have night school in CA.

Professional photography. This is something that I have wanted to do for a long time, ever since I was a kid. Over the years I have gone through several cameras, but it’s really about having that eye for good shots, vice a camera that costs $3000. That will only get you so far. And if you don’t have the right subject/scape, that ritzy camera is pretty worthless. Here’s some stuff I’ve shot, if you’d like to check out my FB page: [http://www.facebook.com/pages/JimmieJack-Photography/101623036557797]

Culinary Arts. I’d like to know how to cook, like real chef-ery shit. I realize this will be an expensive lesson in the kitchen because I don’t ever plan on cooking for the masses or being a professional chef…but I think it will pay off. Plus, learning how to cook things well is fun.

Oh, and if I could somehow swing one of those jobs with Contiki or another major tour company to be a tour guide in some fabulous overseas country, preferably Europe, that would be a job to die for!

See what I mean? All over the place, and I am no longer a young buck. I’m supposed to be making life decisions and shit. I say, do what you want, but you must have the means to get there. So until I can get my feet firmly planted in one category, I will continue to dabble =)





4 days and a wake-up

18 09 2011

Well, I’m trying to get super motivated to pack. But it seems like packing takes forever….perhaps sometime today I will get going….

I’ll be departing the ol F-L in exactly five days. Yep five-days! Seems so soon but so far away. Last week we had three tests. You read that right, three tests. One more test this week that is four days long (who does the curriculum for this class? because I would like to wring their neck). Then, on Friday I depart this joint. A few days of leave and then off to San Diego, the city of a whale’s……

But this packing thing seems to be taking a long time. <————— This is how far I got yesterday…

I know I will be super busy this week, so that’s why I’m trying to get it done today. It’s surprising the amount of things you can acquire over the span of five months. I came here with three bags and I have nearly a car full…

I downloaded all of the band Shinedown’s music last night and I’ve been listening to them nonstop. I know they’ve been around for a while but someone suggested I revisit their talents 😉 One of their songs is actually on my workout playlist, “Breaking Inside”. But anyway, if you’ve somehow forgotten they existed like me, you should check them out again, good stuff.

Deeeeeep breath. This is about to be one. busy. week. between the monster death test, early a.m. pt, checking out, shipping my goods off, and just getting shit in order to peace out, I’m going to try and keep a level head… I’ll let you know how it goes..

Looking forward to seeing everyone back home!!

 





Dating.com

29 07 2011

FL has been plum full of storm clouds for, oh I don’t know at least three weeks! However, there was one semi-sunny day last weekend where we made it to the beach. But other than that it’s been consistently raining. Which means there are thunderstorms, green grass everywhere, and lots of days-in. Except for when we have to go to class, and march in the rain. That is oh so very fun. Showing up drenched to sit in a cold bldg for six hours. Ah well, that’s the Navy for you. Gotta take the good with the bad. However FL needs to straighten itself out before my friends arrive. We will not accept any days but the sunny ones. We need some blistering hot weather (hold the humidity) and sunshine up to our elbows.

I suppose the weather kind of matches my mood lately. It’s been a week and a half since my break-up with the Mista. And I’m ready to go public with it. Well, not really ready to talk about it…but long story short, I was the one who ended it, and we have since gone separate ways. I think I have a commitment issue, I don’t know what it is really. But after 8 months I still didn’t see a future with marriage, family, kids, the whole what-you-see-in-movies thing so it was time to move on. No one wants a broken heart, and no one wants to break one. But the best thing for both of us was to split up. Even if he doesn’t see it now, he will eventually. And maybe we can be friends someday. (I think it’s compulsory to say that at a break-up, but I mean it this time.

Anyway, since the fateful conversation, I have since received a little email in my Junk Box. (Why do people check their Junk email??) It was from a little website known as Match.com. I don’t know if you have heard of it. They only have commercials on TV every hour. Anyhow, I proceed to open it and look it over and wonder if the universe is trying to tell me something. That I made the right decision? That it’s time to move on? I am not ready to move on, and I’m not, definitely not looking for a man right now or anytime soon. Regardless, I decided to investigate.

There are so many dating websites out there, but the two that come to mind are eharmony and match.com. I proceeded to match.com via a handy link enclosed in the email. Here it asked me to fill out several surveys, which I did to quench my interest hunger. There were all sorts of questions. I mean, crazy questions. Do you sleep with your socks on? Do you like to travel? What’s your favorite city? There were of course the typical ‘where do you work’ and ‘likes and dislikes in a mate’ questions. But this was a wide array of personality questions, as the commercials allude to. So I followed through and stuck with the questions until the very end. Then it came time for a credit card. Whoa whoa Nelly. I didn’t say I wanted to actually do this thing. It came time for the do or die moment, and I couldn’t go through with it. But the more I got to thinking about it, the more I realized something…

When you meet someone randomly, in movies it’s called a meet-cute I think, it is 100% based on looks. If you are in a coffee shop and see a handsome guy from across the room and he comes over to have a little chat, he came over there to talk to you based on your appearance only. If you are a member of a dating website, and are looking to meet a match on there, the points of interest are based purely on your personality (and that pic you posed of yourself that has just the right angle). Well, who the website thinks you will have the most in common with. And although the world leads us to believe that opposites attract, it’s actually okay to date someone that you have a common interest with. Like the love of travel, or similar jobs, or maybe the fact you are both divorced with kids.

Online dating has gotten a bad rap over the years, I’m not sure why, or what exactly is so wrong about meeting someone online, getting to know them via personality matches, likes/dislikes, etc and then meeting in person to see if the chemistry is there. Makes a lot of sense if you ask me. Plus, I happen to know three very happy couples that did exactly this, and two of them are now happily married.

So, maybe someday this will be for me….but not quite yet. But after some research, the online dating thing gets my seal of approval, for what it means.