Vanilla

2 06 2014

So how do you know when you’re in a vanilla relationship?

I think we’ve all been there but maybe not realized until it’s too late, or over that it was vanilla.  It’s just kind of boring, stagnant….and lame.

I’ve been seeing this guy I met a bit ago, it’s been almost four months, and I don’t know hardly anything about him.  Learning about his family, hobbies, anything is like pulling teeth.  And I ask, if you don’t want to share/open up, why are you dating?? Or, if your’e not ready, then just tell me and save us both the time.

It’s not like I”m at the point where I need to freeze an egg or anything, but I am pushing thirty.  Like, at the doorstep with my hand on the knob, pushing.  I am truly not trying to rush anything, but I honestly don’t have two years to try and crack that shell. If you’re not ready, I can move on.  I’m at the point where I know what I want….and I think a couple months should be enough to kind of figure out if you can see a future or if it’s not what you need.

Maybe it’s him, maybe it’s me.  But I do know that when you’re dating, you make time for each other, and you start opening up.  You should feel that deep down need to see them and be around them.  And I don’t.  Which is crazy.

I’m usually the friend who’s like mooooove on girrrrlfriend, boot his ass.  But when you’re in that vanilla, you can’t really think or see clearly… When you realize you’re in the thick of it and need to cut ties, you don’t want to be rude, but you also want to explain what you are thinking.  It always seems to go sour though. So maybe a clean cut, a just, um goodbye would suffice??

I want certain things, and I’m not willing to budge.  I can compromise on a lot, but a man meeting my needs is not one of them. I’m like any girl, I want to feel special, I want little surprises – a note, or a sweet comment.  I want to be needed, be heard, and have someone genuinely care about where I”m going in my life, and wanting to meet those needs.

And though I am not the best cook, hate laundry, and don’t know how to fix…..anything really….I bring a lot of other things to the table.

Another thing is traveling.  That I am not willing to budge on. Ever! Love love traveling, and if my man doesn’t have a wanderer’s heart, I can’t do it.

I think the bachelorette gives women kind of a jaded view of love.  That and Disney movies. Puh-lease, no relationship is like princess land-esque.  I get it.  Buuuuut some days you should feel like a damn princess!





Greetings World

9 05 2014

It’s been quite some time since I’ve written. I think we all have busy lives and forget to sit down and take a breath sometimes.

2014 has been a whirlwind so far.

I made a bucket list recently, and one of the things on the list was to quit social media for a year.  So I’m now wondering….does a blog count? Technically I’m not interacting with anyone…but then it occurred to me that avoiding a blog for a year was just simply lazy.

SO, this is my year to quit social media.  I have deactivated my Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, and the like.  And I have an overwhelming feeling of peace with it, I may just go on after 2014 without social media.  It is definitely less drama, and it makes the friends who are real count that much more.  I’m kickin’ it old school with letters, texts, emails, and phone calls.

I made a list of 100 things for my bucket list.  A few of the others were:

Drink vodka in Russia

Yodel in the Grand Canyon

Go on a mission trip

Acts of random kindness

Wave at tiny little people from a hot air balloon

Several others, and I am looking forward to completing them!  I carry the list with me at all times in case the moment strikes me and I jump into a hot air balloon on a whim.  You know, people do that quite frequently, sooo.

I was recently fishing and met a nice man. Well, ok I was on Plenty of Fish….the dating site…and met a guy.  But the story goes, is that we were fishing, and met.  Anyhow, he’s from Michigan and moved out to San Diego for a job.  He seems like a really nice boy, good to his family, polite, and likes to travel, like me.  With our ship’s schedule we don’t get to see each other all that much, but I do enjoy spending time with him.  It’s hard to know early on if it will get serious or not, but I’m seeing where it goes.  Funny thing is that we started talking on Valentine’s Day, so that’s a good sign, right?





Was he the one?

18 07 2013

So, have you ever been in that situation that you miss your ex?

It happens to me more than not with this one. You are on and off…and eventually you realize that maybe he’s the one. And you gave up too soon without trying.

Time away makes you remember the good times, and how he was there for you, accepting your flaws and insecurities when 99% of the population wouldn’t.

You want to tell them everything. So much all at once, but how?  You don’t know where they are at or if you will make a fool out of yourself. Or if they have moved on and are on a completely different road.

OR, maybe it’s just one of those times where you are lonely and just remember the good things and forget all the annoying little things and reasons you couldn’t be with them in the first, second, or third place.

I think as you get older you begin to appreciate the little comforts, quirks, mannerisms of your partner. And you just need them. Someone who is there for you no matter what, thick and thin. You realize that’s the only thing that really matters, the most important thing. And everything else you can work on. I think you focus on the foundation and learn that everything else will fall into place.

…but how do you tell them?





Yacht club

5 02 2013

There’s something rather pretentious about sailing.

I don’t know what it is, but I’ve had this idea of snobby people sipping on martinis (probably not the most sea-worthy of beverages), smoking cigarillos, and dry humored jokes prompting obnoxious rich-people chuckles. Oh, and sweaters/polos with the collar popped.

That’s what comes to mind when I think of yachts, boats, boat clubs, sailing, anything water-esque. So it’s been a running joke to make fun of “yacht clubbers.”

So, this is the very reason I had to take up an offer I received when asked to go sailing yesterday. It was a must. Hell yes I want to be in the club. I’m not a hater persay, I just had these ideas of what a sailing-person would be like.

Anywho, so over to Coronado we headed. Me, and a couple peeps from work. Luckily, the dude had a license and was way into sailing…which meant two things.

1. This will be safe.

2. There is little to no work ahead of me.

So we arrive at the MWR rental place, and get us a 22 foot sailing boat. When we got on the boat, we got her all ready for sea, threw some life jackets on, started the motor, and headed out!

WP_001250And boy were the waters gorgeous! The day started out being beautifully sunny and about 75 degrees, but as the hours drew on, the sun started to disappear! It was a tad windy and chilly, but it was still awesome out on the water. After we got out of the marine, we raised the sails and were officially out to sea! We tooled around the San Diego harbor and over by the Coronado bridge. Every sailboat we passed waived at us and they were so friendly! About halfway through we realized our buoy was still hanging over the side, perhaps people were actually pointing at our buoy and not really waving….

sloop-fractional-labeled

We had a gay ol’ time, and I got a tan while we were out in the “sun”. That’s a two-fer right there! It was fun to be involved in moving the jib and learning some sea-terms!

There was a regatta race or practice going on because there was a swarm sailboats out there that were going in one direction, then another, and at one point it looked like they were tipping sideways. Two of them crossed bows and it looked like they were about to run into each other!

When we got back to check the boat back in, we were talking to the desk lady and she was a military wife. Her and her husband and two teenagers live on a boat in the marina that is 32 feet long. Only ten more feet than the boat we were on, which is similar to the above picture. Imagine four adults living on a tiny boat!!





Gaslamp San Diego

4 02 2013

Have you ever visited a city and decided then and there that you were in love with it? I’m having somewhat of an affair with San Diego. Since moving downtown three months ago I have really learned to embrace the hustle and bustle, although my “city” life is a tad different than every other city dweller. I get up and leave the city to go to work in the morning, whereas people who live here pay more to live in the city for a shorter/easier commute.

I rather enjoy the city people noises that linger in from the streets, people watching from the comfort of my couch, and even the night noises that would keep normal humans awake. It reminds me that life is so busy and while we are all on drastically different paths, we all have a way of cohabiting with one another and enjoying every challenge life throws at us. We humans are a hearty breed, indeedy.





Twothousandthirteen

6 01 2013

Hello webbers.

Happy New Year!!

Dusting off my typing fingers and putting some words up today. It has been oh so long since I’ve posted. No, I did not get wiped out by hurricane Isaac, I’ve been busy sailing the world. Well, the Gulf of Mexico anyway…

Since August, we have taken our brand new ship from New Orleans, through the Panama Canal, and around to San Diego. We got to see  a little bit of Mexico as well. The Panama Canal was pretty bomb. It took forever to transit, but there were some gorgeous views.

I’m currently reading “The 4-Hour Workweek” and it’s sort of changing my life. Buy it now you won’t be sorry. The end.

I’ve moved downtown San Diego, and I’ve been slowly checking out the bars down here. Double Deuce and Tipsy Crow have been captivating most of my attention. Which is difficult because I’m sometimes ADHD.

the_tipsy_crow

Things on the docket this year:

Family coming to visit me in SD!

Traveling to Hawaii, Alaska, and China!!

My friend’s wedding!

Starting a business!

Complete my MBA!

Oh boy, as if I wasn’t busy enough. How do people accomplish everything. I can’t wait to make this year ten times more productive than the last!

 





Lane-isms

7 06 2012

So I’m sure at work you all have “that guy” who is completely awkward, kind of strange looking, and says shit that only creepy people think is normal.

We had one of those in Hawaii and these are a few of his “isms.” Found these while I was packing today.

1. Yea, the townspeople raised me. (Talking about how he was “raised in a cult”).

2. My glasses enunciate my forehead, they make it more pronounced.

3. Today is deader than my great great grandfather who died from kerosene poisoning.

4.  I’m perfectly content with talking with myself.

5. I was forced to eat one apple every five minutes for three hours. It was an order from the cult leader.

6. Why does no one talk about the fact Jesus had bastard children?

7. I wonder what it would be like if Inspector Gadget was a porn star.

8. My genius is actually true.

9. I’m not a good catcher, if you catch my drift.

10. (Someone asks) What color is this? (Lane responds) Shiny.

11. Sometimes I wish I was a bastard.

12. You just said my magic language.

13. My parents didn’t even know they were getting married until the middle of the meeting.

14. I don’t understand half of what I say or a millionth of what I think.

15. Someday I’m going to open Neverland Ranch 2.