more like Rape-tex

12 05 2011

Okay, so today as I was walking home from la escuela (Day III was a success, due the three extra hours I went in early) and it occurred to me that I would need to purchase a parka so I could wear it in the compound we have school in. It so happens that our classroom is affectionately nicknamed the “Ice Box”. I offered no chuckle, not even a slight resemblance to a smile, or a laugh, or a noise even after this was conveyed to us by the teach on Day I. Freezing cold? Not a laughing matter. It’s a shut your mouth and tell-me-where-the-heated-blankets-and-space-heaters-are matter. So, naturally. Day II I bring in my comfy military issue fleece overthing. It kept me quite warm that Day II, and I was happily content and ready to be learned. Day III rolls around, and in wanders an individual who happens to work at the schoolhouse, outrank me, and follow Navy uniform regulations to a T. Said person persues to ask me what I am wearing. To which I respond like any human would, “A fleece…” To which he responds like only an in-human would, “You can’t wear that under your blouse, you have to wear it inside your gore tex parka.” WTF. Are you kidding? It’s about 20 degrees in here, and you are telling me since it’s out of regs, I can’t wear this fleece thing, JUST in the classroom, JUST for today BECAUSE it’s sub zero?

This guy's thrilled about it too

Anyhow, that upper business brings me back to my walk to the NEX. So as to retrieve a gore tex parka to zip my fleece liner into so I can be socially correct for this Navy douche. So, I grab a size small, short and a medium short (how I am considered short at 5’7″ is puzzling…) to model in front of the tri-mirror-jobby. Small fits, so small it is. Thank you Navy for not considering how women are in fact different from men and have hips, boobs, and things of that sort, I look like I’m floundering in a muu muu. This particular uniform visit, I look like a seemingly large woman in a size small.

$173.59 later, my bank account has been gouged and I have a digital camouflaged jacket I can wear for the cold while in uniform, back home during winter, and for those times that I’m feeling especially elusive. May I ask, what is so especially outstanding about this gore tex obsession? Kind of feels and looks like a normal coat to me…

On another WTF note since I missed the opportunity yesterday..there was an Air Force female who walked right out of the bathroom stall today without even glimpsing at the sinks, soap, or hand dryer. Seriously? I know you are straight out of high school, recently out of the parents house living on your own like a big kid. But really. Soap. Water. Dryer. Three simple words. I couldn’t even scowl at her since she was facing the door, making a beeline for the door really. Maybe I had offended her in some sort of negative one second sideways glance on my way in. Quite possible.

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2 responses

12 05 2011
decidinganotherday

Did your fleece liner from your DCUs fit into the new goretex?

13 05 2011
bloodlovehopeluststeam

yeah, the lady asked me seven times if my fleece was the same size so it would fit. i guess if you get a slightly different size even, the zippers won’t fit.

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